I think I may be all blogged out this week. There's not much to talk about...

There's been a trip home to see my parents. There's a dress I want to link to but I haven't got the code for it and I can't find it on the website. It's a strapless wonder at the moment but because it slips down when I raise my arms (don't all strapless dresses do that? So why make them the new in-thing?) I need some straps for it. My mother had a brainwave: use the belt/ribbon that comes with the dress to fashion some straps. So it's at home at the moment waiting for AmberMammy to work her magic. It's extremely pretty. It was a present from Mammy for the wedding-nuptials we're going to in a couple of weeks. Not my wedding nuptials. It's a renewing-the-vows type of thing. It's also an excuse for me to show off Ray to my mother's side of the family. A couple of them have met him already but quite a few haven't. I get to be proud girlfriend for the night :) There's also been a lot of writing this week.

Last night there were some chippie-chips. Jem takes Martha to the groomers every six weeks and it always falls on a Thursday - Shop Day. Because I cannot be bothered to cook again Ray and I always have chippie-chips as a treat. It's this one weird evening every six weeks where it's just me, Ray and Sweepie. We always take Sweepie with us to get the chips and it's just this tantalising taste of what's to come in a few years time. It's great that I can get a taste of things to come and that I like how it tastes. The chips tasted damn fine, too ;)

Today there was badminton - I'm still the champion ;) There will be the Olympics in an hour. And The Tudors this evening. The weekend? I have no idea yet. I think there's some window-shopping with Mammy tomorrow; visits to the families on Sunday; in between hasn't been decided yet. I like it when there's a whole weekend stretching out in front of me like this with very little planned. In fact Friday afternoon/evening is probably my favourite part of the weekend: because there's so much to come and Monday feels like it's weeks away.

Enjoy your Friday, Saturday and Sunday :)

Labels: amber, badminton, blogging, family, in-laws, jem, life, mammy, ray, shopping, the tudors, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 4 | permalink |

Ray came home early from work to join me in my lazy day. Well, that wasn't really why he came home early. The why is because his co-woker decided to give himself the day off and didn't inform Ray until an hour after Ray had been sitting in his house waiting to get going! The excuse was the van was broken. Ray had his car, obviously, and therefore they could have gone to work in that but that didn't happen so said he was going to do as much work as he could on his own in the house they're working on. By 2pm he couldn't do anymore cos he needed tools that were in the van, which he hadn't had chance to get that morning. So he wasn't in the best of moods when he got home. I'm of the belief that work life should be a happy place. Usually it is for him but his co-worker is the boss's son so although the boss and son might communicate between each other neither one of them thinks to let Ray know. It happens a lot and is usually the only reason Ray gets pissed at them. It wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't being paid minimum wage. He works hard and deserves more. When they piss about like this he gets annoyed and gets very itchy feet. On top of that we can't afford to have random day's off because that means we're down a fair chunk of money, which just isn't workable for us. I know things will be fine again today (no early arrivals yet anyway) but I do wonder just how much longer this will continue. Going self-employed is an option we've been discussing cos then his boss would pay him on a day rate (of his own choosing) and be able to do other work for people so really he could work/earn as much or as little as he chose to. But there's risks involved. More financial than anything else. Such as the dreaded tax man. Ray's been self-employed before so he knows what he's doing but there's actual bills that need paying that could see us out on the street if they're not paid this time round. Ahh there's always decisions to make, isn't there? And they're never easy. Any one gone self-employed? Any advice? Scream yay or nay!

Anyway, my lazy day did continue. I held Ray while I read. He slept on and off, waking up to tickle me every now and then. We made love, we made food. Ray then went out to the cinema with his cousin. I answered some emails, wrote in my diary. Then I decided it would be best to wrap Ray's birthday presents up because I think they're so so pretty that I keep getting them out to look at them! It's quite pathetic. So last night I wrapped them up and they're now hiding in Jem's room waiting for the two weeks to be up. The rest of the evening was spent laughing at Halo 2 and reading. My reading bug is fierce at the moment. I cannot put the damn book down (I'm re-reading the Dark Tower series so it's one of those seven books). I love it when I can't stop reading; it always, always helps to improve my writing. Ray returned home with chocolate and Starbursts (remember when they were called Opal Fruits? I still call them that; Starbursts is such a stupid name and makes no sense), which I picked at until it was time for bed.

I woke this morning pining longingly for my lazy day to be able to start over again. I doubt I'll have another day like that again this summer. I think you're allowed one a season, right? Roll on Autumn then! ;)

Labels: birthday, life, money, presents, ray, reading, self-employed, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

I've had a very lazy start to a day.

I woke up to say goodbye to Ray this morning and decided that I wanted a lie-in. "Leave a note for Jemma to tell her to feed the dogs for me," I mumbled. I fell asleep before he'd even left the room again. I thought I slept for hours after that (even though I knew I couldn't have really cos I have a second alarm set for when I have to take my pill and that hadn't sounded). I had very vivid dreams about attending a prom, Gary Barlow was my date and was going to show up wearing red just like me. But I wasn't wearing red. And when he did turn up I couldn't actually see him. When it was time to leave loads of people started crushing towards the taxis and one guy got ran over and I heard his bones crunch. In the dream I had a panic attack. It was a very strange dream. Usually I can make out where the weird bits come from, where my subconscious has pulled them from, but with this one I'm at a loss. I'll blame it on the going back to sleep; that usually gives me weird dreams.

I wasn't up and about 'til gone ten and wasn't showered and dressed 'til twelve. Such a lazy day.

But it's raining out so I knew we wouldn't be walking the dogs (Martha refuses to walk in the rain for some reason). I haven't had a lie-in in weeks so I thought I may as well act on my impulse and have a lazy day. It feels fantastic. I've just been reading (the Bible and Wizard & Glass) and poking my head out the window to watch the rain fall. I haven't seen this much rain in ages. It smells fantastic.

I'm sure there's more to say but my mind is lazy. I don't know if I'm going to write or not today. A part of me thinks what will come will be sloppy and bad, another part of me can't keep away from the story.

So I think I'll make a cup of tea, eat a few squares of chocolate and see what happens with this grey, drizzly, lazy day :)

Labels: dreams, life, reading, weather, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 3 | permalink |

Through my nostaligia, my recent obsession with thinking back and pondering over those things I just couldn't quite understand at the time, I've made some realisations. About others in my life, and about myself.

The other day I wrote this and I got a reaction from Jem that I wasn't expecting. She asked if I'd written it to get at her cos she'd said she didn't like where the characters were heading (long-story-short: I gave her an unfinished novel based in "Olimpia Valley" to read, which took the characters somewhere very dark; I'd already told her she wouldn't like it so wasn't surprised when she said she didn't). It threw me. Because when I'd written the entry I'd actually been thinking about something Stephen King had written and I'd read by chance when I was a bit bored. It was at the beginning of one of the "Dark Tower" books (the recent editions) where he said that he always loved returning to the "Dark Tower" world and that it was a place he always found easy to fall back into. He mentioned how the only other world that took him so strongly was "The Stand" (which, incidently, I haven't read and therefore did not know was based in a post-apocalyptic world). So my thoughts went simply this like: How weird he has an olde worlde world and a post-apocalyptic world just like me with "Soul Mates" and "Olimpia Valley". I wrote that afternoon and the words just tumbled out and I was so high on the writing, so high on the characters; and I realised I was living vicariously through those characters; how in another life I might have made the same choices they do/did. So I wrote that entry but simplified it and just summed it up in a few words.

My thinking afterwards was how easily we misinterpret things that people say and do and automatically twist them around to fit into what we're thinking. We all do it. I know I do. I like to think I can project myself into other people's thoughts (being a writer I have to have that ability to some point other wise how would I write about people I didn't particularly agree with) but I often put my own thoughts on top and come to the wrong conclusion.

This led me onto a sudden understanding. That when a certain family member turned against me and tried to turn my mother against me in the process, it wasn't anything to do with the fact that I was in whatever form playing Mother to Amber. This woman had an issue with the fact that I was getting on so well with my father. This woman tried to turn my mother against me because of her own issues over her jealousy that her daughter and husband had always been close, that her daughter had chosen her father over her mother (her). All these years I believed it was because of Amber, because I rallied us three girls (sisters) together and wouldn't let a single one of us crumble under the pressure. I thought this woman thought I was in someway disprespecting Mammy and her parenting skills by coping while Mammy was away.

It was a nice realisation in a way. It was nice to be able to step back eight years later and be able to see things with fresh eyes, with emotions that aren't tainted by grief and anger. I've always found it amazing how wrong people can get things, how we all assume this that and the other and how nine times out of ten we're way off the mark. I've always said, "You never know what's going on behind closed doors," because it's true. The face people show you is not always the true one. Not in a dishonest way, just that we don't all run around showing the things that have scarred us (I know I don't anyway) and so how can you tell whether what one person thinks happened is actually fact?

I've always been fascinated with the psychology of the human mind. I think maybe I missed my calling ... ;)

Labels: amber, daddy, jem, life, mammy, rant, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

For those who don't follow my writing blog/journal (here or here), I have some very exciting news.

I'm going world wide with Shadows.

Okay, yes, technically I am already world wide with Shadows @ LuLu but I'm going to be even more accessible in a few weeks time. Why and how? I qualified for a free distribution package (it was always out of my price range), which means my book will soon be available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble, and will be listed in the Bibliographic Database. Because the book now has its own ISBN number.

This doesn't mean I'll sell more books but it does mean there's more chance of people stumbling across it. Heck, I don't care if I don't sell a single copy - the fact that I'll be on Amazon is exciting enough! The fact that there's a possibility of people seeing it and liking it and purchasing it is also extremely exciting, of course, but you know me: I write cos I have to and not for profit.

The book won't be available for about six-eight weeks so there's plenty of time to wait yet. But as soon as it's there I'm sure I'll post time and time again with giddy excitement.

Labels: books, self-publishing, shadows, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 5 | permalink |

I got itchy feet with my writing/author/book website so I did a brand new layout:



What do you think?

I used books because obviously the website is about writing books, and I added pictures of my cute glasses, which are the ones I leave upstairs for when I'm writing. The orange colour just came from the glasses. I also decided to switch the updates over into Blogger because Jem wanted to subscribe to them :) Makes it all look a lot neater now, as well, I think; plus it'll be easier to update now.

That just leaves one more site to work on before I get back to my real job (writing)... my photo site. I'm thinking of closing it down. I never add anything new to it anymore because my photography bug seems to have passed itself onto Ray. I really only liked taking photos of the puppies and live bands anyway. I don't have any more puppies because they grew up (yes I do still love taking pictures of Sweepie but I don't feel they're good enough for a website; they're just for me), and the live bands I do see (if I see any) tend to be getting-squashed-down-the-front bands, where you do not want to take your precious camera (well I don't anyway). So I think the website might soon close down. I haven't decided yet, though.

I'll be a bit behind on the blog-reading today because I'm baby-sitting Falls for my mother (Sweepie's brother) and he needs constant attention. So I'll read the blogs tomorrow. Don't all post a hundred times just because I'm a day behind now, okay? ;)

Labels: Fall Out Boy, gigs, layout, photos, puppies, sweepie, websites, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 3 | permalink |

I got waylaid and ended up reading...

Children of the Dust by Louise Lawrence


rating: 5 of 5 stars

I first read this book when I stole it from my older sister who was reading it for a school project. The first section of the book "Sarah" had me in tears. Being of a similar age to Sarah I was really upset by the horrors she had to face.

The next two books go on to show the next generations of Sarah's family and how they survived the nuclear holocaust. It's an interesting view. I like the way the author didn't shy away from the mutilation, from the harsh reality of life after a nuclear holocaust.

It still is one of my favourite books and I read it frequently.

View all my reviews.

I love that book so much. I think it's what made me a little bit sickly obsessed with nuclear war. I'm calling it research for my next novel but really that's a lie. My next book does not deal with nuclear war but it does deal with bombs of some nature, more the long-term effects. Yes, the new novel is dark.

There was also, rather spookily, a programme on TV What Would Happen If Human's Suddenly Disappeared, which was also very helpful.

I'm a little weirded out by how much information I'm getting without even having to really sit down and do proper research. I'll take it a sign from God that my next project should be Olimpia Valley. That I should stop thinking about what to do and start planning the damn book. At least sort out the concept. I still don't know whether to do a series or one big novel, how to set the chapters out - long or short? One character's perspective or a few? Whether to pepper the chapters with additional information, such as history and politics? Hmm, so many questions to answer. I love this part best of all. So many ideas, so much excitement, so much hope.

And last night Ray and I went out on an impromptu date to... Homebase, where we played house. I've found the toilet seat of my dreams. Ray says he'll buy me it for Christmas ;) I also fell in love with some handles for the kitchen units (can't find them on the website...). And something we should be picking up this weekend: Shower Rail because the plastic crappy one the landlord left us with has fallen apart for the last time. I can't wait 'til we're able to do proper decorating in our own house.

Labels: house stuff, olimpia valley, ray, reading, review, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

For a while there I thought I was addicted to my birth control pill. Because when I was on it I was fine, but for those seven days when I had to go cold turkey I turned into a crazy bitch from hell. I would be lying there crying because I couldn't stand the onslaught of my uncontrollable hormones. Funny, because I've always had whacked out hormones so you'd think I'd be fine. Not so. This month I tried really hard not to be a junky. I had one night (two days after I stopped taking the tablets) where I thought I might commit multiple murders but I bit my tongue, swallowed down my hysteria and just had a good cry instead. Is it possible to be addicted to birth control pills? The reason I bring it up now is because today I started back on the tablets. I hadn't missed them nearly as much this time round so being back on them hasn't made a whole lot of difference... yet.

I've been a busy bee this week. In and out of town every morning, buying this, sorting out that, exchanging those. It would make me think I don't even need that damn tablet anymore (aside from the obvious need not to get pregnant, of course). Creatively I've been on fire. Good Reads is my new favourite hang out...

Love Like Hate Adore by Deirdre Purcell



rating: 1 of 5 stars

Each Deidre Purcell book is different to the last - different era, writing-style - so I never know what to expect. This one sounded as though it might be interesting but I was disappointed with what I found. The story didn't seem to go anywhere and the main character never appeared to know who she was so her reactions to things were often very different to how she reacted a few chapters back. I just found the story a bit pointless, the main character unlikeable and the subject matter left a bad taste in my mouth.


View my Profile

I'm #26 in their top list of reviewers. Told you I'd been busy. I can't stop reading. I've got another three books out of the library to read. Going by my usual standards I'll have them all read within a week or two. Not forgetting the most important and exciting bit of news this week: I completed Soul Mates IV. My baby is now four years old (really older than that but I prefer to stick with how many volumes of the book have been completed - hey, I'm mother and if I say I want my baby to stay a baby forever then that's how it'll be ;D).

So I've decided all this evidence is pointing to the fact that I am not yet a slave to my birth control pill, I am capable of living like a normal human being while I'm off it, and I can get heaps and heaps of stuff done whether I'm under its influence or not. Maybe that nurse had been right to refuse me a new prescription of it. Maybe I reaked of birth control junki-ism. But I floated back to the surface this month so I'm not lost... yet...

Labels: books, life, review, soul mates, the pill, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 4 | permalink |

The dog did run away again. He got past me, dug up the stuff I'd put in the hole he'd made and scarpered. He was back by morning and I practically ran out the door when it was time for me to go home. That was officially the most stressful day on the job so far. For the first time in ages, Ray and I slept in each other's arms all night last night. Usually one of us gets too hot or my neck starts to hurt (I have a weakness in my neck from when I pulled it a few years ago) so we pull apart during the night. I think I was so desperate for some protection I stayed close to him all night. It was nice. I'd say it might become the norm but I know it won't so there's no point. I overheat when I'm asleep. I'm sure there's some scientific reason for it. I'm cold when I'm awake and boiling when asleep. Weird.

Today I finally did some writing. It's felt like writing is just a hobby I do if I have time lately. Not as if writing is my full-time job, which it is. I hate it when it gets like that. It's all these jobs. I know they're only for a couple of days but it breaks up the routine and then I can't get back to it cos I'm catching up on other things that need doing.

I've uploaded some new photos, which are from various weekends/weekdays I've spent enjoying the sun. There's a lot of the dogs this time round (as if that's not the norm ;D).

I've also become a little obsessed with Good Reads and have been posting some small reviews of the books I've read recently. I always find book reviews helpful when I'm choosing a book to read but I never write any so I thought I'd put that right been as I must have read about ten books in the last month! And a lot of them have been really quirky and very me. Such as Landscape With Animals which is an erotic but has more to it than just that - so rare to find. And Polystom which was both sci-fi and olde worlde - again, extremely rare to find such a mix. It's so nice to find other authors who mix genres like I do. There is hope for me yet :) And even if there isn't it does prove that there are good books out there.

Labels: dog-sitting, photos, ray, reading, websites, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

...for a little help?

http://welshcake.livejournal.com/24468.html

Any suggestions, opinions, confusion - anything really - would be gratefully appreciated :)

Labels: live journal, publishers, soul mates, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 1 | permalink |

I had a visit from Poopy-Wednesday yesterday. She was exhausting. She's hit a very naughty stage. When she was quiet it was great but when she started running round again I suddenly remembered why I like to see the puppies go to new homes when they hit this age ;) Here's some photos from the day, if you want to see some dog-only pictures :)

Last night I found a bargain chair! You know how I said I wanted my room to have a blue colour-scheme? Well, I don't have a chair for my desk, cos the one I used to use at home was part of a set that belonged to Mammy and Daddy. So since we've moved in I've not been able to sit at my desk. So when I found a blue chair for only eight-pounds I just knew I had to get it! It's this one - but blue. Look at how happy my desk looks now:



It's really comfortable, too. I thought it would be quite nasty, what with the cheap price, but it's very nice, and it encourages me to sit correctly cos it has a proper straight back to it. Usually I just slump in chairs and get a really bad back. So it's cheap, comfortable, kind to my back, and blue! Perfect!

I used it today for the first time. Because today I started back writing, after an absence of... four months. I always knew I'd be taking about two months off to look after the pups, but then we moved as well and it's taken this long to settle and actually find the time and adjust my routine. I can't tell you how good it was to get back to it. I feel complete again. I'm working on the fourth volume of Soul Mates, which is my baby. "Soul Mates" is what got me writing good, got me writing regularly and just made me realise that writing is what I want to do. So I'm also calling the new blue chair a good luck charm been as it all went so well :)

Labels: daddy, dogs, house stuff, life, mammy, photos, puppies, soul mates, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 3 | permalink |

I got a bit mopey last night. I think it was a comedown from the weekend. Back to normal life is always a little depressing, isn't it? After a good whine to Ray I felt a lot better. Today I spent the morning cleaning - and I only ever clean when I'm happy. Even got the mop out as well!

This afternoon I worked on my writing site and have now got a very pretty layout. It's very similar to how it was but I've just tweaked a few things here and there and, in my opinion anyway, I think it's looking much better.

CHECK IT OUT HERE

I've added a Buy My Book banner on the left << but it's too big for the page so I've had to shrink it. It doesn't look as good as it did so I think this may be the excuse I need to make a new layout for the blog. I've had this one for ages now - probably the longest blog layout to stick around! I haven't got a clue what I want the new layout to look like so I wouldn't be expecting anything to appear any time this week.

I don't think I mentioned but... I'm going to see The Used on Thursday so will be awol for the day. It's part of the Taste of Chaos Tour. So far the venue has been changed and the door times so I'm a little concerned that the gig might suddenly get cancelled. Should be a good night if it does go ahead. Although, to be honest, I either don't like or don't know the other bands on the bill. So I may become a fan or else be really bored until The Used come on stage.

Labels: gigs, layout, life, ray, self-publishing, the used, websites, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

I stumbled across a pretty cool website that seemed professional and affordable. So I went for it. I am now a self-published author.

I started with Shadows, because it's a book I think has a very strong story-line, plus it's got some totally fucked up characters in it. If you want to read my work - in a spanking professional book-bound way - then please, please, please click on the link below:



Expect some shameless self-promotion over the coming weeks hehe.

Edit to add: It was as if God was having a little chuckle to himself, because this morning I got a rather hilarious rejection letter from a publisher I'd sent Soul Mates to. Nothing about whether the book was well written or that they didn't have the space on their books for me, nope just a quickly written note saying, I'm afraid that it is not really our sort of thing. Hehe. Why not just say what you're really thinking Kate Hordern Publishers? You wouldn't touch a gay character-based book cos underneath it all you're homophobic. Ahh, you wouldn't think it would still exist in this day and age, would you? This is just the perfect example of why I've gone down the self-publishing route - no one gives stories based around a gay character a second glance.

Thanks Jem for being my first purchaser - you are officially my first fan, first supporter, and first person to turn me into an official author :)

I'm away at Ray's for the weekend so I'll probably be awol until Monday, so enjoy your weekends :)

Labels: self-publishing, shadows, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 4 | permalink |

I haven't been in the best of moods this week, hence why I haven't blogged anything of worth. Everything seems to be in that limbo-state, which isn't a good place to dwell for too long.

There's some stuff I can talk about, other stuff I can't, other stuff I won't. In brief, I am spending a lot of time sitting around waiting for the pups or Madge to need me. Because it's only their first proper week they don't need me much. Madge needs some extra food, entrance to and from the cage when she pleases; the puppies just need cuddles twice a day for hour/two hour periods to get them used to us all. When they open their eyes I'll have too much work to do running round after them. But their eyes aren't open yet. So I'm in limbo. Sitting around doing nothing makes me extremely bored and mopey.

I know, I know, you could say Why don't you write to fill the time then? The problem with that is I just finished Olimpia Valley and so need some time off from a new novel. I'm reading through Soul Mates books (currently on volume 2) because I'm going to start work on Volume IV next. So why not just write some short stories instead? The problem is the house is very full at the moment. My younger sister has been here all week and only told me yesterday that that's going to be a permanent arrangement now because she's dropped out of college again. So the house is going to be full and noisy, which doesn't make a good environment for writing. If I wasn't on puppy duty I'd just lock myself away in my room, like I normally do, and write that way but I am on puppy duty so that means no writing.

So that hasn't helped my mood. Plus the fact that the house is so full all day and night does mean I'm not getting any time whatsoever to myself, and I'm the kind of person who needs proper alone time at least once a week. I haven't been left on my own in about a month now. That's probably a big reason for my grumpy mood actually. Plus, cos I'm puppy-sitting I'm meant to be down here with the pups most evenings, which means Ray and I get zero time to ourselves. And you know how couples need time on their own - not just for sex, get your minds out of the gutter!

There's some news that I can't talk about cos it's just so up in the air I couldn't even explain even if I wanted to. Another limbo situation. Urgh.

Mammy surprised me with a gorgeous teal-coloured short-sleeved jumper. I fell in love with it about six months ago so I was totally surprised when she handed it to me Wednesday night. She'd had a shopping spree with her friend, and has a store card that gives her about 50% off everything so it only cost her about a fiver :) I love a bargain!

I got to go out Wednesday night. Actually dressed up like a girl, rather than slobbing round the house in my puppy wear (which means dirty jeans and unflattering tops). Me, Jem and Ray went out down the pub for a drink before I dragged Ray home and upstairs for some quality time alone.

So it hasn't all been bad. My mood has pretty much been bad all week but things are looking cautiously positive. Like I say: everything is in limbo so it could go either way. I hope I get the answers next week.

At least Sweepie's eye is doing much better :) She didn't have to go to the vets after all because she's responding so well to the eye cream. Still needs constant cuddles from me though ;)

Labels: amber, clothes, dog-sitting, jem, life, madge, puppies, ray, sweepie, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 0 | permalink |

Ray cooked me dinner last night, which was great cos that means, what with being away and eating out, I haven't cooked a meal in a whole week now! I am getting lazy. But I will be cooking tonight. I just haven't decided what yet. Having to wait 'til he'd finished work meant I was very hungry by the time I was eating. I did contemplate ending the relationship due to my hunger ... hehehe.

We had the house to ourselves at his place again. I'm starting to get a complex - do his family not like me anymore? They always disappear when I show up, which isn't often due to Ray's funny work times. Hmm. I harassed Ray by taking silly pictures of him and then we cuddled up and watched Doc Martin. I had to discreetly drool over Joe Absolom while Ray wasn't looking hehe. I'm so glad Joe's back in the show. I haven't seen him on TV in ages.

Today I got a freebie through the post - yes, I actually got post! Has the postal strike ended for good now? I can't be bothered to check. Anyway, my freebie was some Pantene Highlights Expressions. I adore Pantene and they always send out freebies, too :) The only problem is this time they've sent me stuff for blonde hair whereas I'm a brunette. Never mind, it's all the same thing really; they just package it in different colours.

I'm trying to sort out something for me and Ray for New Years Eve. Jem is going to her friends in Cambridge so I suggested Ray and I might like to stay at an uber posh hotel and enjoy pretending to be a rich and successful young couple. I have a hotel in mind but I'm not posting what it is in case I can't get it. I should know by the end of the week (ish). It's going to be our last splurge before the Big Move next year.

Madge is all but bursting at the moment. I swear she's swollen up overnight. Only another twelve days and I'll be an auntie again. Can you tell how excited I am? Whee, I love babies! And, just in time really, I completed the first draft of my recent novel yesterday. This week is looking so very, very good to me right now :)

Labels: joe absolom, madge, new years, puppies, ray, tv, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 1 | permalink |

I had a great weekend at Ray's. I think his twenty-first was celebrated in style and when we parted company last night he was still smiling so I would consider it a successful birthday. It was strange having to say goodnight to him actually, back to the usual place: my back door; I get used to sharing a bed with him far too quickly. Twenty-four years of sleeping alone, two nights sharing a bed with a boy and I miss him when he's not there. The female brain is a strange thing.

My weekend turned into one of those long weekends you hear people talk about. Which basically meant I'd finished all the chapters I had prepared on the Wednesday, and then went out doing other stuff on Thursday and Friday, as well as being away for the weekend.

Thursday I went shopping with Mammy and Jemma. Shopping with Mammy is amazing. She just makes it so much fun. And we were all having so much fun we had to stop halfway for lunch in the shop's cafe cos we'd exhausted ourselves. I ended up with an orange top, a stripey one with button-details around the neck and a pair of blue jeans. I've been looking for pictures of the clothes online but apparently they don't exist online so I'll take some pictures and either add them to the post later or else I'll post them next time. Call me biased but I think they're gorgeous.

Friday we had the Pug Show. That was a six o'clock start - yawn. It was fun, though, all of us in the car, laughing along with the Foo Fighters and Chris Moyles, following this rickety old bus which looked as though it had fallen through a time rift from the 1970's - even the people on the bus were dressed in 70's style clothes! The day was long at the Pug show. Falls went on early and won third and we were all very proud. Sweepie got sleepie but couldn't sleep until she crashed out on my lap just before her class. So in a class of twenty-three dogs (!) she didn't really shine enough and ended up with no placement. But we were all very proud of her and she got lots of hugs and kisses. She didn't care, though, she just wanted to go home. Bless.

Then on Saturday I got Ray to actually spend some money on himself. He's awful with money. He never gets himself anything; he just frits the money away. He wanted to buy me stuff but I refused, telling him I'd been shopping already and so his extra money from his boss (cos I'm not the only one who loves him apparently) got spent on himself. I took his hand and led him into the shops and got him to spend. He ended up buying a gorgeously cute white-tee-and-wool-vest-zip-up-thingy, a green shirt, heaps of spanners for work, and a new pair of trainers. He spent about £130 in one weekend - all on himself! I was very proud of him. I just believe that his bonus pay should go on himself. We had a nice dinner out, as well, although it took about an hour between ordering and getting our food.

Last night I fell asleep at about 11pm with the Bible still in my hands. I never fall asleep when reading the Bible, cos, well, it's just not something you do, is it? So when I woke up, I said a quick prayer, popped the book back on the shelf, climbed under the blankets and promptly fell asleep. I didn't wake up again until about 9:30am. So bang went the brainstorming for the new chapters of Olimpia Valley. So I'll be doing that this afternoon instead.

Time to get my washing done then. I've got a meal out with the in-laws this evening. It's the family meal we always go out for when there's a birthday in Ray's family. Means I get to wear my new orange top so I'm very excited :D

Labels: bible, birthday, jem, mammy, money, ray, shopping, sweepie, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

I've been writing non-stop these past two days. I think I've written twenty-three pages in just two afternoon's of writing. While I'm very happy with that progress, it did mean I had to tell Ray not to come over early yesterday when he, for once, finished work early. Oh dear. I don't think he minded too much. His gran wanted him to fit the new cooker, and one of his cousins is down with an xbox360 so I'm sure he amused himself with that. I wonder if this manic writing will continue all week...

Once I finished writing, I got changed and Ray picked me up and we went out for a pizza at Pizza Hut. This particular Pizza Hut I've had trouble with before. The service is exceptionally slow and crap, the food is often burned, and you're always left for about three hours before you get your deserts by which time the pizza's swollen up in your stomach so much that you think you might vomit. This time the service was as crap as usual. For a start they always sit couples on these facing-each-other long tables so you have to stretch half a mile down the building to even reach each other's hands. Why is it that restaurants always think couples want to sit opposite each other? It's not romantic; it's annoying. We usually pick a four-person table and then sit on one corner each but this time the woman seated us. We ordered our food straight away, thinking that this time we might get food before dark settled in. The cheesy-garlic-bread was great. We babbled and babbled, trying to work out whether Ray has male-sperms or female ones; well, it passes the time, doesn't it? Then the pizza turned up. We'd opted for the vegetarian pizza with those cheesy bites that you dunk cos we've never tried it before. Halfway through my second cheesy-bite I asked Ray why there was meat on the pizza. He went to find the waitress - heaven forbid she should be on the floor, checking her customers - and had to wait a further five minutes while she finished taking an order on the phone. Then I heard her say, "I thought she said meat supreme!" She speaks very clearly, cos I don't have a very Welsh accent I always speak clearly cos other wise people can't understand me so I know I spoke clearly. She indeed. And then asked us if we were vegetarians!

She took the pizza away, with a lame apology. She then returned and said they had to cook a fresh pizza so we'd have to wait ten minutes - then we had a proper apology. Obviously someone in the kitchen had warned her we might be secret service people who come in to check the service. We weren't but we could have been. Finally we got our pizza - by now our conversation had turned to how to raise boys differently to how to raise girls - and she said sarcy that it was a vegetarian supreme. Yes, we knew what it was - we'd ordered it! Of course, by this time I wasn't very hungry anymore so I only had two pieces of the pizza and a few very filling cheesy-bites. We then had to wait another twenty minutes for someone to see we wanted our bill. Still didn't get it, of course, so we just walked up to the till at the front of the shop. At the till the woman suddenly was full of apologies and trying to make conversation with us. Too late, woman!

So I've told Ray I'm done with that Pizza Hut. The ones in Cardiff, Newport and Bristol are great but this local one is pants. So no more local Pizza Hut.

We then went for a wander around the shops and Ray got me to try on a cleavage-enhancing bra and flash him my very pert boobs from the changing rooms.

I got home late and found out that Sweepie had had a funny turn and passed out in the garden. She's done this twice before and both times I haven't been around. Mammy's always been there, and says that she thinks Sweepie just forgets to breathe cos every time it's happened she's been playing with her brother. But I'm a little more worried. What if she has epilepsy? So I'm very worried about her and want to keep her close to me today. Of course Martha blames me. But Sweepie is curled up under my chair so I don't think she thinks it's my fault. Ray says she did it cos I went out and left her and Sweepie hates it when I go out without her. Funny cos Mammy said the same thing. Awww...

Labels: pizza hut, ray, sweepie, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 0 | permalink |

Time is nearly up. Nearly time to return home. I can't say I'm excited by that prospect. Rather unusually for me, I've been moping over the return home for the past couple of days. I didn't think I'd mope quite so much. It's pretty pathetic. Moping won't change anything. I just have to be patient. Keep following the dream.

I had a Life Chat with Ray last night and I said how it would be easier for us all to move out if I was earning a regular wage. I said how I wanted to feel bad about not having a quote-unquote normal job but I enjoy my writing so much I find it difficult to feel too guilty. He asked why I should feel guilty. I think his exact words were, "Yeah, but who actually cares that you don't have a normal 9-5 job?" That stumped me. Cos for many years pretty much everyone cared. I had family members who barely knew me or the situation having a pop at me at any available opportunity (part of the reason I refuse to do the Family Visits these days), friends of my parents who again didn't know the situation, having a go at me; my parents made me feel like a worthless piece of crap. Apparently you're only worth something if you have a 9-5 job. Well, that's how it was. Things changed when I started dog-sitting properly a couple of years ago. Now I have my own money coming in regularly-ish (I usually do get money at least once every couple of months) my parents no longer hassle me. I no longer see the family members who hated me for not being normal, and my parents' so called friends are no longer friends so I don't see them either. So, yes, Ray posed a good question - who does actually care now? I couldn't think of anyone. For the first time since leaving school I am getting no hassles from anyone about my career choice. I found that quite liberating.

Of course, it doesn't help with me wanting to move out of home. I know I'd need to get my books published for that to happen. On my terms anyway. Buying houses is completely out of the question cos none of us three (me, Jem and Ray) have hundred's of thousands of pounds saved up. And renting is just out of our reach at the moment as well. But we're perservering (sp?). As Ray also said last night: "You're happy how things are at the moment, though, aren't you?" I am. Living together would be great - it took me two-and-a-half weeks to realise that living with Ray would be great - but we're more than happy as we are at the moment so there's no need to get hysterical about it.

In the end, I guess all I can say is what I always say: everything happens for a reason, and it'll all work out as it's meant to.

Labels: family, life, ray, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 0 | permalink |

I randomly clicked on a link on someone else's comments and found a writing meme/quiz. So this one is snagged from Un-Cool:

1. Do you outline?
Depends on the book. Sometimes I do. Most of the time I start with an idea, then write out a few chapter ideas and then see where they take me. Once they're done I usually have ideas for the next collection of chapters.

2. Do you write straight through a book, or do you sometimes tackle the chapters out of order?
I write in order. How the heck do you write out of order?

3. Do you know how a book is going to end when you start it?
I usually know the main thrust of the book. But the smaller story endings come about as I write and the characters talk.

4. Where do you write?
At my desk or sitting halfway down my bed.

5. What do you do when you get writer's block?
Get depressed, and snappy. I usually eat more. And mope. Then I read a lot. And it usually goes away then.

6. What size increments do you write in (either in terms of wordcount, or as a percentage of the book as a whole)?
I tend to write about 4,000 words per session

7. How many different drafts did you write for your last project?
"Soul Mates III"? That had three re-writes. It's my baby and so I wanted it perfect. I usually only do the original write, then a clean-up.

8. Do you let anyone read your book while you're working on it, or do you wait until you've completed a draft before letting someone else see it?
Jem very rarely gets to read a chapter here or there. I used to let her read as I went along but it took the fun out of it. So now no one reads anything 'til it's done.

9. What do you do to celebrate when you finish a draft?
Spend a day doing whatever I want. And usually I want to go out and drink ;)

10. One project at a time, or multiple projects at once?
I usually have two books on the go, it stops boredom.

11. Do your books grow or shrink in revision?
Hmm... Well, "Soul Mates" 1 got longer, 2 got shorter and 3 got longer so. As for the other books I'd say they tend to stay the same.

12. Do you have any writing or critique partners?
God, no!

13. What are your favorite writing books?
I've never read any I don't think.

14. Morning writer, evening writer, or doesn't matter?
I write after lunch until I can't do anymore. I do like to write late at night sometimes as well.

15. How do you handle reviews? Open 'em up and brave 'em, or wait?
I've never had a proper review but I suppose I'd read them and then cry if they were bad hehe

16. How do you handle rejection?
I swear a lot and get very disheartened for a few hours.

17. Do you prefer to work on writing by yourself? Or do you prefer collaborating?
I couldn't collaborate. Not on a book. I don't know how that would work.

18. Able to work on airplanes?
I've had story ideas on planes but I've never written on one

19. Have you ever abandoned a book or an article that you had finished? When? Why?
I've only ever not finished one book - "Him". It fitted the times but then I left it for a few months while I worked on something else and then when I went back to it it just didn't fit anymore.

20. What writing advice do you really believe in?
Write until it just stops coming and then stop. Don't force it cos it'll be shit work. Write when you want to, basically.

Labels: meme, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 0 | permalink |

I thought I'd post the pictures of Sweepie from last Friday when me and Ray took her to Pembrey Country Park.

Here she is not wanting to sit on the floor of the car on the way down:



She thought she'd do a much better job at driving:



This is me giving Sweepie a drink of water. In the next photo we're both being zapped by the sun!





Pretty soon she was tired and hot - she only has little legs remember:



That dust ball in the centre of the photo is Sweepie. She was chasing after a stick Ray had thrown for her:



After a while we had to sit down cos Sweepie was tired. So we picked a spot up on a hill and watched the sun set. Again, Sweepie didn't want to sit on the floor and, of course, her father gave in and picked her up (she's so spoilt):



She wasn't being carried - I just picked her up for the photo. As you can see, she was more interested in the passing cars:



Sweepie threatening to drive us home again:



And on the way home, we stopped at the harbour to eat some chips. Sweepie finished mine and then started harassing Ray for his (he only gave her one or two).



You can see some sun-pictures I took that night HERE. There's a couple of other additions as well, so please take a look at the site :)

And I updated my writing journal.

Labels: pembrey, photos, ray, sweepie, websites, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 0 | permalink |

Really: nothing has happened! Nothing blog-worthy, anyway.

I did have a strange dream last night that a well-known junkie's step-daughter told me her step-dad had been busted. Then there was a mass brawl in the middle of town between junkies and non-junkies. There was a lot of blood and I was left to clean it all up. I've been having some very vivid dreams lately. My brain's working overtime! I still haven't recovered from a nightmare I had two nights ago about having nails in the backs of my thighs.

About the only news-worthy thing I have done is buy a new book. I'm going dog-sitting again later this week and I always like to take a book with me to read. The only problem is I always read horror stories, which are no good to me when I'm alone in a strangers house. So I picked out one of my favourites - Nick Sagan's Idlewild - to re-read. Then I remembered that there was a sequel to the book that I had never been able to afford to buy. So buy it I did. It's called Edenborn. Should be very, very good; the first one was great!

I bought a few new CD's over the last couple of weeks. I bought Muse's Absolution on a whim. I've been in love with the songs on that album for years so because I had some spare cash I bought it. And it hasn't disappointed. Then there was FOB's Infinity On High. I'm still undecided on it. Some songs I loved on first listen, others I'm really not that keen on. I'll wait a while before I've decided on that one.

Last night I had my first falling out with Halo 2. I've progressed onto the Hard level now. Halo 1 was great fun but Halo 2 is just a little on the annoying side. I don't like it when they make games so that your enemies have stupid amounts of more health and weapons than you. Obviously I don't want it easy - I spent four hours trying to complete one bit of Halo 1 and I loved doing it! - but Halo 2 is really just taking the piss a bit. I'll see how I get on with it today. It's certainly not good for the blood pressure that's for sure.

I didn't only play Halo yesterday - I wrote as well. See, getting back to normal routine again.

It's Sweepie's first birthday tomorrow. One year ago my life was turned upside down by eight squealing, needy puppies. Aww, I miss them...

Labels: birthday, dreams, drugs, Fall Out Boy, halo, muse, music, nick sagan, reading, sweepie, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 0 | permalink |

It was Ray and I's eight-month anniversary on Thursday. We went out for a drink and ended up leaving halfway through after getting into a huge fight. We finished the argument in the car and I ended up going home early. That was the biggest argument we've ever had. Trust it to be on an anniversary! Not to worry cos we made up again the next day. I kind of love arguing cos I love the making up.

That day was also SARAH'S 24th birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!. I hope you had a great day :D

Saturday I spent the morning arguing with Jemma. Then Mammy brought home her new car, which is bloody huge! It's a stupidly big estate thing. It's very pretty but, damn, it's big. I'll have to get some pictures of it. It's her new baby so I let her drive me around in it for a while to keep my mind off the fact that Ray hadn't come over to see me. But while we wer driving about Ray texted to ask if he could come over :)

So we all had pizza and chips for dinner mmm. Once Daddy got back from the pub Ray and I sat downstairs and laughed at how drunk he and Mammy got and all the random things they were saying about things on the TV. I ended up watching about half of crappy BLADE II. Mammy fell asleep, Ray went home so I put Mammy to bed and then myself.

Yesterday was nice. Ray and I spent the whole day together. Everything is fine between us again. I say again: I might pick fights just so we can have the making up part again :) I bought myself some new hairdye and some ink. I sent off letters to six publishers/agents and I have another two to try once my ink has arrived and I can print out the letters and sample chapters. I also had to buy Ray some gas for his blowtorch cos B&Q wouldn't sell it to him cos he's not twenty-one, which everyone has found very, very funny. That cheered us all up actually after Ray's sister said a tearful goodbye (she's moved to Manchester to live with her boyfriend).

This last week has been such an emotional rollercoaster. I'm hoping for a nice quiet, boring week this week...

Labels: anniversary, birthday, family, ray, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 0 | permalink |

The weekend was good.

I didn't have to go to the rugby. I was planning on going but Jem was really ill and then Ray got ill as well so I didn't. I spent the afternoon looking after them both while playing Halo 2. Yes, I've completed 1 and have already moved onto 2. I don't know what I'm going to do once I've completed this one cos there is no 3. I'll have to find a new game to get obsessed over.

I didn't think I'd end up going out Saturday night but Ray got better at about 9ish so I suggested we go for a drink. We went down to see the rugby boys but there weren't many left. In fact, only the middle-aged ones were - and I don't get on with them well. I walked in and one of the more disgusting ones walked around behind me and said something about how I hadn't been shagged up the arse yet! I'm curious as to how he'd know such a thing just from looking! Understandably, Ray got pissed off with him, especially when he continued being an arse. In the end his friend took him away. We only stayed for one drink cos there was only the kids left. I don't mind being there with the kids, they're decent enough, but I'd already exhausted that avenue of conversation the night before. The kids are quite slutty, you see, and like to sleep with one another on a rotational basis. I didn't understand how it all worked so Ray told me what he'd learned from them during his stint of working behind the bar. I was fascinated, to be honest.

Anyway, we decided the other pub would be better so we went there. And it was. Much better. Even got a free drink off Ray's boss! In fact, we were so deeply engrossed in conversation we didn't notice the pub had emptied and the barman had even cleared away the bar. Oops.

Sunday we took Sweepie for a long walk. We're teaching her to come back when she's called. Her main issues is with cars. She just doesn't like them. When they drive past her she lunges at them. And if she's off the lead when they go past she chases them! Which is no good at all really. She was surprisingly very, very good. And she's quite slutty - she found about four different boyfriends during her walk. She was exhausted by the time we got back to the car and slept on my lap all the way home. Aww.

It was great when we got back cos Mammy had cooked dinner so I didn't even have to cook! It was funny cos Daddy pulled the table out and set place-mats down and stuff just cos Ray was there. Usually we all eat in front of the TV! It was quite sweet really cos they're both trying to get to know Ray now cos I think they've just worked out he’s sticking around - took them seven months to figure that one out! Plus Daddy's been a right arse to me lately so I think he's trying to make it up to me by being nice to Ray. My younger sister didn't take to it all very well at all and ended up stomping around, pushing Ray very rudely out of the way. By the time I'd figured out what she'd done she'd already ran off again so I couldn't even tell her off for it. It was too good a day to spoil arguing anyway so neither one of us could be bothered to argue with her about it.

We were gonna go down the pub again last night (like, the fourth day in a row now I think!) but it was closed so we just headed back to Ray's to say hello to everyone.

Today I got back to my writing. At last, it's all working again! I hate it when I can't write. (read more) It doesn't happen often but when it does I panic like hell. And tonight I'm getting food cooked for me by Ray so that's my second day without having to cook. I could get used to this. . .

Oh, and I was lucky this time: the tonsil only hurt for a couple of days. So hopefully there'll be no more tonsil ache for the rest of the year!

Labels: family, halo, illness, pub, rugby, sweepie, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 0 | permalink |

How the hell is it a new year already? I didn't get the Chrismassy vibe, and it certainly didn't feel like I was ringing in a new year. It was a weird festive period this year. I enjoyed, though, it was just enjoyment in a different way to normal.

I have the usual new-year-illness now. Tonsillitis. Bleurgh. I've had a cold-ish thing for the past week and then this morning I woke up to find my left tonsil huge and veiny in the back of my throat. Mmm, nice. Never mind. It's not like I don't know how to handle tonsillitis, is it? It's like my specialist sport in illnesses really.

I'm still not back to my usual routine. The writing won't happen for me yet (probably cos I'm ill), I'm barely online. I haven't updated any of the sites in ages. I'm in a lame-ass mood at the moment. Blame the tonsil. Ray's brought round the xbox so I've become newly obsessed with Halo. I tried driving a car in it yesterday and spent about half an hour in floods of tears cos it was just too funny how bad I was at it!

I've given up trying to customise a Live Journal layout. I tried and failed. Hehehe. So I've gone for this look now. So expect more updates there once I get myself back into routine.

I'm just feeling so sluggish at the moment. It doesn't help that Daddy's started a new job and isn't feeling very confident in it so keeps picking fights with me. We're barely talking at the moment and I hate bad feeling like that. I've spent the last week either hiding at Ray's house or else going out for food, taking Sweepie to meet the in-laws and, of course, playing the xbox.

Never mind. Once the tonsil shrinks back to size I can get writing again and all will be normal again.

Hope everyone else's new year has started better than mine has! (Don't worry, although I haven't been commenting I have been keeping up to date on everyone's blogs/journals :) )

Labels: halo, illness, live journal, new years, websites, writing, xbox

by Ys | COMMENTS? 0 | permalink |

I lost my favourite vest-top/jumper this morning. I was a little confused as to where it could have gone because the last time I wore it was about two weeks ago. After checking through my cupboard, the pile of clothes I always leave on my chair and my chest of drawers, I decided to look in the only other place it might be. Sometimes my mother "accidently" puts other people's clothes in my younger sister's room. She doesn't actually but she says it's her fault if other people's clothes are found in my little sister's room. Unless she's on one of her kicks, and then the little sister is called a thief and all that nonesense. When I went into the room my little sister was in there. I told her what I was looking for but she said she hadn't seen it. Okay, yes, she often lies so I thought I'd better check myself. But she was on the phone (to her boyfriend, I think) and my presence in the room was suddenly a great discomfort. You'd swear she was making a deal of some kind to her pimp or drug dealer the way she carried on. Anyway, I didn't find the jumper. Didn't mean it wasn't in there, of course, just that I hadn't been quite brave enough to go through all the many layers of clothes that act as a carpet. You never quite know what you're going to find in there - old food gone green, etc. I went back into my room, began combing through my wet hair, panicking, wondering what the hell I could have done with my top. When I looked down and found it. Scrumbled up on the floor at the end of my bed. Then I remembered when I'd last worn it. And when it had quite quickly been taken off again, discarded on the floor and forgotten all about. So, panic over: the top has been found and the memory really made me smile.

Then I received a spectactularly nice letter from a publisher. I'd sent them some chapters of my book Soul Mates I: The Path To Destruction about two months ago. I hadn't heard anything back from them and so I assumed it was another no. Well, it was a no but it was a positive one. The lady said she totally agreed with me that there was a big market for such a story, she said she thought the story was good, that it was well-paced and she enjoyed it. Unfortunately the book was too big for their company because they only have about five books a year. My book too big a challenge! I was quite impressed with that. It was a no and I don't like the endless rejection letters you get - you know the deal: publisher's won't read your work unless you have an agent, an agent won't read your work unless you have a publisher - but it was very inspiring all the same. It really did make me smile. A lot.

And just last night I found out that my laptop wasn't quite as dead as I first thought. Yes, it is clearly not as good as it once was, but it may not be yet dying so quickly. Turns out the battery is upsetting it. So all I need is a new battery. What with Christmas round the corner I am quietly confident my baby will be back in full working order by January. Until then I've taken the battery out and am using it totally on mains power.

All this smiling really did cheer me up. Because yesterday I went back to see the doctor and she said that there is absolutely no reason why a girl my age, as a non-smoker, I should still have this chest infection. And she said if this new course of medicine doesn't work she's going to send me for chest x-rays! And a visit to the Asthma Clinic. I'm a little scared by the x-ray possibility, especially considering last time I was anywhere near a hospital I ended up moving in.

The only bad thing to have happened this morning actually is that my parents' male dog pissed on my bed! Thankfully, it wasn't all over the quilt (I have no idea how I'd have cleaned that up); he aimed it on the knitted blanket my Gran made. Even more annoying than that was my father's reaction: that it was my fault. I'm tempted to go and piss on my father's bed and see how he likes it...

Labels: dogs, family, illness, laptop, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 0 | permalink |