It's Ray's birthday today. He turns twenty-two. When we first started dating he was nineteen. As I keep on reminding him: he'll always be my younger man no matter what his age ;)

The celebrations started Friday night with what I seem to recall was called "the best ever". Saturday we planned a lazy day slobbing around the house, hugging Sweepie and making sure she didn't feel too sad when we left her the following day. It didn't work: she saw me packing and started pouting that night. Sunday was a very early morning wake-up call so that we could be on the road by 8. We weren't actually on the road 'til twenty minutes after that. The wedding vow renewals were lovely. They got it done in a little wood hut, which got me quite excited cos I've always had this vision of my ideal wedding day... I won't give it all away but a hut-like building is in there. The party afterwards at the pub didn't include dancing unfortunately (the singer didn't turn up!) but there was lots of conversations with various members of my family. I rarely get to see my parents' brothers and sisters so when I do I always feel like a stranger. They're all really close so we're always out on our own. Not this time, though; this time we were embraced, which was really nice. I got clucky over my second-cousin who is four years old and doesn't ever shut up. "Are you ready to be tickled, girls?" So dodgy ;) Ray curled his hand over mine, tapped my wedding finger and mouthed "Mine." The night was going great 'til I got really bad stomach pains and had to run to the toilet in fear I was going to vomit. I had to go home by 9pm. I couldn't work out what was wrong until I remembered that I'd taken some painkillers without food. That's what upset my stomach last time. I'd worried my period pain would ruin the night so I took my strong painkillers; turns out they were what ruined it for me in the end. Typical. I missed my mother being hilariously drunk. She's always a laugh when she's drunk ;) She did think the room Ray and I were sleeping in was a toilet... But found out quick enough it wasn't not to cause embarrassment ;)

A TRIP TO TELFORD

Today, it being the actual day of Ray's birthday, Ray and I spent half an hour in bed before we had to get up. He opened his cards and was allowed one of my presents (Series 5 of "Red Dwarf"). Tonight he gets to open the rest, gets to eat banoffi pie, and he has one extra present, which I picked up today in town. I'll gush and share pictures tomorrow. Today I have to wrap presents and get everything ready for him :)

Labels: birthday, family, illness, life, love, mammy, photos, presents, ray

by Ys | COMMENTS? 0 | permalink |

I'm pretty wiped out this week. I feel like I haven't sat still for more than five minutes.

Last weekend we got a letter from the landlord: we're having an inspection on September 1st. To start with I panicked. This is my home now and the thought of someone coming in here (the someone who actually owns the house) and judging it and me kind of freaked me out a bit. Then I realised I was worrying over nothing. The house is pretty much spotless 90% of the time; we've got all the rooms looking very pretty now; and we love it here, which I think brings an extra element of niceness to the overall feel of the house.

But the inspection has made me go a bit cleaning mad. Well, that and the fact that in between the Olympics watching (yes, still hooked) I get a bit twitchy cos I'm not writing. I always clean much more when I'm not writing. I guess I have all that extra energy and time then, don't I? So I started with the floors. I hoovered and then mopped them all with the special stuff especially for laminate floors. I then moved onto my room. I ended up moving furniture around on my own (the wardrobe was the heaviest!) and have got it looking a bit better in here now. I'm still not 100% happy with it but that's cos it's a square-shaped room and working with a square is all but impossible when you have a big double bed to squeeze in, and an oddly placed radiator to contend with. I then weeded the front garden, pulling all the weeds up on the other side of the wall, too - the road side. I weeded the potted plants out there and then washed the front door cos it looked a bit grubby. Today I plan on cleaning the bathroom, and over the weekend I might tackle the back garden. Phew. I find cleaning strangely theraputic. Plus it should mean the house is sparkling like a new pin when the landlord arrives next month :)

The decision I thought I'd have to make fell through. Well, when something makes you cry you know it's time to walk away and explore other options. I don't think there'll be other options to consider. I think it's all done now. We're all happy where we're at. So - touch wood - no upheavals any time soon :)

The weekend starts now, doesn't it? Mine will be an extra day long because I've got the family wedding and so won't be back 'til Monday. We've all got our pretties (even Ray, who relented and let me drag him round the shops trying to find trousers that fit him - he has such tiny legs! 29 inches! I wear 34 inches! BHS is the only store I found who sell 29inch-length trousers for men.), we've got our drink's money sorted; now I'm just waiting for the pining for Sweepie to kick in. I haven't had to leave her in so long. I doubt she'll miss me, though ;)

Enjoy your weekends! (And don't post too much cos I won't be back online 'til Tuesday to read your blogs ;D)

Labels: cleaning, landlord, life, olympics, ray, renting, shopping, sweepie

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

First of all: CONGRATULATIONS to Gen & Andy who got married over the weekend! It was such a romantic story; made me go all goose-pimply when she told me :) Good luck with your futures together, guys; may there be much happiness and love.

It seems to be the time for the big decisions in life. Ray and I have had a few conversations this weekend and they've culminated into a decision about one aspect of our future.

For those who don't know: I might not be able to physically conceive or/and carry a child. I had some surgery when I was in my teens to get rid of some out-of-control ovarian cysts and in the process of being mis-diagnosed (GP's are great, aren't they?) they'd grown huge and spun and tangled things up. During the second op' I lost my right ovary and fallopian tube. It's perfectly plausible that I can still conceive. Plenty of women have only one ovary and have babies perfectly fine. But then again plenty don't. I also have no idea what the scar tissue is like and whether or not that will play any part in it.

So, what's that got to do with anything, right? Well, I stumbled across a test that can tell whether or not I am producing any healthy eggs. (For the record: I don't believe I stumbled; I believe I was guided to it.) It won't test for anything else but for me that's one of the big things that hangs like a question mark over everything. Am I even producing any eggs from that one remaining ovary, and are they healthy?

So we've made a plan. My Pill prescription runs out in December. I won't renew it. We'll wait at least six months for my body to run off the effects of The Pill and then we'll take the test. Of course I know it shouldn't take six months for the effects to wear off but a year from now sounded like a good time frame for us. From there we'll make a new decision. That'll depend on many factors. If the test shows I'm fine are we ready to have babies then? Or, do we even want to have children of our own, do we just want to adopt/foster? If the test shows I've got no healthy eggs then I'll probably go to the doctors, get it assessed and find out exactly what's wrong. Then the question will be: are we ready to adopt/foster yet?

This decision doesn't mean we're planning babies for next year; it's just the first step in that direction. I've always wanted to adopt/foster anyway but I'd still like to know whether or not I am capable of conceiving naturally because a part of me really wants to have Ray's baby. But that's all a decision for next year. For now I'm just extremely happy to be moving forward and making that first small step. Coming off The Pill isn't such a big deal, either. It was never really the wonder drug for me - my periods are still heavy and painful, my mood swings are a little extreme on my off-week, and my boobs have grown too big! ;) So come January I'll be starting down the path back to the real hormone-challenged me, and the path to motherhood.

Labels: adoption, fertility, friends, life, marriage, maternal, motherhood, ray

by Ys | COMMENTS? 5 | permalink |

I think I may be all blogged out this week. There's not much to talk about...

There's been a trip home to see my parents. There's a dress I want to link to but I haven't got the code for it and I can't find it on the website. It's a strapless wonder at the moment but because it slips down when I raise my arms (don't all strapless dresses do that? So why make them the new in-thing?) I need some straps for it. My mother had a brainwave: use the belt/ribbon that comes with the dress to fashion some straps. So it's at home at the moment waiting for AmberMammy to work her magic. It's extremely pretty. It was a present from Mammy for the wedding-nuptials we're going to in a couple of weeks. Not my wedding nuptials. It's a renewing-the-vows type of thing. It's also an excuse for me to show off Ray to my mother's side of the family. A couple of them have met him already but quite a few haven't. I get to be proud girlfriend for the night :) There's also been a lot of writing this week.

Last night there were some chippie-chips. Jem takes Martha to the groomers every six weeks and it always falls on a Thursday - Shop Day. Because I cannot be bothered to cook again Ray and I always have chippie-chips as a treat. It's this one weird evening every six weeks where it's just me, Ray and Sweepie. We always take Sweepie with us to get the chips and it's just this tantalising taste of what's to come in a few years time. It's great that I can get a taste of things to come and that I like how it tastes. The chips tasted damn fine, too ;)

Today there was badminton - I'm still the champion ;) There will be the Olympics in an hour. And The Tudors this evening. The weekend? I have no idea yet. I think there's some window-shopping with Mammy tomorrow; visits to the families on Sunday; in between hasn't been decided yet. I like it when there's a whole weekend stretching out in front of me like this with very little planned. In fact Friday afternoon/evening is probably my favourite part of the weekend: because there's so much to come and Monday feels like it's weeks away.

Enjoy your Friday, Saturday and Sunday :)

Labels: amber, badminton, blogging, family, in-laws, jem, life, mammy, ray, shopping, the tudors, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 4 | permalink |

Ray came home early from work to join me in my lazy day. Well, that wasn't really why he came home early. The why is because his co-woker decided to give himself the day off and didn't inform Ray until an hour after Ray had been sitting in his house waiting to get going! The excuse was the van was broken. Ray had his car, obviously, and therefore they could have gone to work in that but that didn't happen so said he was going to do as much work as he could on his own in the house they're working on. By 2pm he couldn't do anymore cos he needed tools that were in the van, which he hadn't had chance to get that morning. So he wasn't in the best of moods when he got home. I'm of the belief that work life should be a happy place. Usually it is for him but his co-worker is the boss's son so although the boss and son might communicate between each other neither one of them thinks to let Ray know. It happens a lot and is usually the only reason Ray gets pissed at them. It wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't being paid minimum wage. He works hard and deserves more. When they piss about like this he gets annoyed and gets very itchy feet. On top of that we can't afford to have random day's off because that means we're down a fair chunk of money, which just isn't workable for us. I know things will be fine again today (no early arrivals yet anyway) but I do wonder just how much longer this will continue. Going self-employed is an option we've been discussing cos then his boss would pay him on a day rate (of his own choosing) and be able to do other work for people so really he could work/earn as much or as little as he chose to. But there's risks involved. More financial than anything else. Such as the dreaded tax man. Ray's been self-employed before so he knows what he's doing but there's actual bills that need paying that could see us out on the street if they're not paid this time round. Ahh there's always decisions to make, isn't there? And they're never easy. Any one gone self-employed? Any advice? Scream yay or nay!

Anyway, my lazy day did continue. I held Ray while I read. He slept on and off, waking up to tickle me every now and then. We made love, we made food. Ray then went out to the cinema with his cousin. I answered some emails, wrote in my diary. Then I decided it would be best to wrap Ray's birthday presents up because I think they're so so pretty that I keep getting them out to look at them! It's quite pathetic. So last night I wrapped them up and they're now hiding in Jem's room waiting for the two weeks to be up. The rest of the evening was spent laughing at Halo 2 and reading. My reading bug is fierce at the moment. I cannot put the damn book down (I'm re-reading the Dark Tower series so it's one of those seven books). I love it when I can't stop reading; it always, always helps to improve my writing. Ray returned home with chocolate and Starbursts (remember when they were called Opal Fruits? I still call them that; Starbursts is such a stupid name and makes no sense), which I picked at until it was time for bed.

I woke this morning pining longingly for my lazy day to be able to start over again. I doubt I'll have another day like that again this summer. I think you're allowed one a season, right? Roll on Autumn then! ;)

Labels: birthday, life, money, presents, ray, reading, self-employed, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

I've spent the weekend researching the new condoms.

We started with Yellow - Safex Sensitive. Supposedly they're thin and make it all feel much more, well, sensitive. I've been waiting patiently for the Durex version of these to be made available in the UK but so far no luck. But, anyway, they weren't really that thin. To be honest, they felt like your bog-standard condom. Neither good nor bad, just an average condom.

Next was Grey - Safex Ribbed. I think maybe I'm just built differently than the girls these ribbed condoms are meant to pleasure. Fair enough, so far I've only tried two different kind of ribbed condoms but both did nothing to help me along the way ;) To be honest, I think these ones actually delayed my orgasm (that could have just been me, I guess, though).

Last of all was Green - Safex Natural. These are meant for if you have an allergy to latex, neither of us do but they were part of the pack I bought so we gave them a go. In my opinion: the best of the three. Gave the best orgasm for me ;) Ray said they were a bit snug for his liking, though.

So all in all, I think Safex are not really the brand for me. I think they must make your average kind of condoms; you pay the price they're worth, which isn't that much. Still, I'll be happy to give the rest of the pack a few more rounds just to see if my opinion changes ;)

The one condom I must reccomend above all others is: Crown Skinless. For a start they're pink! The perfect colour for a condom cos obviously skin is pink so you can barely even see it (hence why they use it in the adult film industry). I thought that was an ingenius idea. Why on earth are condoms made that awful yellowy colour anyway? It is super thin, which makes it all feel very natural. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that it makes it feel better than bare in a way because it shapes around the penis and just pulls it all in nice and tight; sort of like a push-up bra, maybe ;) The only problem we have with them is that Ray is slightly allergic to them (typical!) so we can't use them too often. Definitely the best condom I've found so far :)

Still my favourite condoms (aside from Crown) are the Durex Elite. Weirdly enough, they were the first style of condoms I ever bought. Seems subconsciously I already knew what worked for me ;)

Labels: condoms, ray, sex

by Ys | COMMENTS? 1 | permalink |

You'll never believe it but... it rained again last night! I wouldn't say it rained all night but it did on and off. Today it looks like it did before the hot weather hit - cloudy and grey - but it still feels incredibly warm and sticky. I had to go into town today to get some food and I thought I might melt onto the pavement even though it was picking with rain! We're having some very crazy weather this year.

Simon didn't end up coming to visit yesterday. He's coming over tonight instead, with Ray's mother. But we went down to see him last night anyway. It was loud and excitable and extremely overwhelming! It was fun trying to play Guess The Actress, Guess The Film with Simon, though; his memory is even worse than mine! Tonight I get to play hostess here. Trying to stop the dogs from wrecking the place is the hardest part. They like to play and in doing so usually pull the cushions off the sofa and slide the mats up the walls ;) One more day and then they can run wild again hehe.

Ray and I then spent the last part of the night curled up in bed trying to debug each other's brains. It came to me as clear as day why my mind went into meltdown. My brain related something that happened to someone else to a bad time I went through a few years ago, and it just brought back all the memories and made me go a bit insane. Isn't the mind a weird and wonderful thing? I'm glad I know what was wrong now anyway. I was trying to work out Ray's psycology. He's had a very interesting life. The things he's been through should have seen him wound up in jail or something equally as bad, but he went completely the other way. He doesn't dwell on what happened then and is happy where he is now. It's very refreshing but also a bit annoying cos then I only get the facts of what happened and not how he felt about it all. I'll break him one day ;)

I've spent this morning hiding from Steve. Remember Steve the estate agent who wouldn't give us our deposit back, then later got fired for not doing his job right? Well, he's been walking up and down our street (that's not too unusual he does live up the road a bit but we've never seen him before) a lot. Then I had to go into town on my own and I was worrying I'd bump into him and... yes, I did! But he just looked away and pretended not to see me - even though we walked right on next to each other! Hehehe. Probably thinks I'm going to kick his ass again like last time I saw him - verbally, of course; I don't believe in violence. I haven't seen him again since so maybe he'll go back home now and stop stalking me.

Ooh more exciting than any of that crap, of course, is...The Harry Potter Trailer! I cannot wait 'til November :D

Labels: estate agent, harry potter, house stuff, in-laws, life, ray, trailers, weather

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

It rained last night! We were meant to have a storm but that turned out to be just some heavy rain (that lasted all of ten minutes!), a couple of rumbles of thunder and one bolt of lightning. Of course, we went recycling when it started up so had a wonderful view of all the clouds as we drove right into the so-called storm. I haven't felt so giddy over rain in years. It feels like ages since it last rained.



What can I say? Ray was also giddy from the rain. He loved running across the recycling car-park to get rid of the old toaster cos it meant he got absolutely drenched. Was it wrong of me to want to park up somewhere, get out and have sex in the rain? I swear, it hasn't rained properly here in ages! Don't be surprised if there was a million new babies conceived last night. That brief storm was quite electrical, or it could be like I said: everyone giddy cos there hasn't actually been any rain in ages.

On our travels we picked up some more spotty stuff for the kitchen. I got the tins I mentioned in my previous post. So everything is looking much cleaner now. I just want one more pack (there's two big tins in each pack) to put the dog stuff in now and I'll be happy. The kitchen is looking very pretty, I have to say. I'll take some pictures soon to show it off ;) I've had to make everything look sparkly and lovely for our visitor tonight. Uncle Simon is coming over, who is Ray's favourite uncle. We went to stay with him in August 2006 and had a great time. But I don't think I've actually seen him since, perhaps a flying visit here and there but nothing else. I love having visitors these days. We're having sleeping-over visitors next month and we're all - sadly - extremely excited about it ;)

Ray started playing his other new game last night - Dark Sector - which is so pretty. (So no worries of losing him to Oblivion yet, Fink, but thanks for the warning ;D) Jem and I read our books and Ray played his xbox, the dogs lazed about on the floor, and it was just a lovely, quiet time. As I said at the time: it's going to be one of those memories that I cherish when this time of my life is over. I love it when we sit there quietly together like that. No arguments, no bickering, no pouting, just all of us together as friends.

Labels: dogs, house stuff, in-laws, jem, life, ray, recycling, video, visitors, weather, xbox 360

by Ys | COMMENTS? 4 | permalink |

I'm going to draw a line under my emotions from last week. I can't change anything and obsessing over it doesn't help anyone so I'll do what I can when I can. And hope it's enough.

I had a lovely weekend, which helped to cheer me up a lot. I went out with Mammy and Jemma to see The Dark Knight on Saturday. Heath Ledger is as good as everyone is saying he is; it isn't just being said cos he died. I thought the film was a bit long-winded but it was still very good. I don't understand how it got a 12A certificate, though, cos it was seriously dark and quite a lot disturbing. I wouldn't want my children seeing it. At the end a group of them rejoined their parents and started saying how they'd cried in fright through most of it! Besides that factor, I really don't think young people would really get what was going on. On the top level, sure, but not all the psycological parts. I reccomend the film, anyway :)

Sunday was spent visiting everyone, and doing a little shopping ;) I didn't buy anything too grand. Just a mug-tree. It's not the one I wanted (I wanted a white wooden one) but it was the best I could find:



The kitchen is very fastly coming together. I love the white-with-spots look; it's cute. I'm going to get some round tins next to store some of the junk is so that the worktops aren't bogged down with bowls full of knick-knacks. I prefer clear worktops.

While Ray bought himself a couple of new xbox360 games. He's waited patiently week after week and then this week he gave in and bought two. I could link you to them but I don't actually know what they're both called. I know one is Oblivion because we had fun making up the character's face to look like Ray ;)

That afternoon we went visiting everyone. It was a really lovely visit back to Ray's house. Dale's shaved all his hair off, though! He has such lovely blonde hair, which he grows long and then shaves off. Nicky gave me a mini-gumball from her mini-gumball machine and we all had fun laughing at Mams trying to blow bubbles. Everyone is such fun when it's sunny, aren't they?

Then it was onto my parents' house with the two dogs, where we had a huge BBQ and stuffed ourselves silly. There was lots of silliness, lots of laughing, lots of noise and games with the dogs; and we ended it all by walking all six dogs up the road together, which caused Sweepie such excitement that she had to be carried for most the walk in fear she'd pass out (she doesn't handle heat and excitement well together at all).

SUMMER BBQ

So all in all it was a really nice, fun weekend.

And it ended with the best words I could have heard: "If we weren't skint we could have a baby now." :)

Labels: daddy, films, house stuff, in-laws, life, mammy, martha, motherhood, ray, sweepie

by Ys | COMMENTS? 4 | permalink |

I'm feeling much more sane now. We watched my Tudors DVD and all that bodice-ripping and heaving bosoms drove all other thoughts clean out of my brain. So no more tales of woe from me... until next month ;)

I am perfectly happy with how things are in my life. And I think that was one of the factors that drove me round the twist. Not meaning to sound melodramatically woe-is-me, but things didn't exactly go too well for me past the age of fourteen. It wasn't until I was twenty-one that I reclaimed my life and started actually doing what I wanted to without getting an incredible amount of grief for it. And now here I am, four years later, and I have everything (or at least the seeds of everything...) I've ever wanted. I'm totally in love with Ray who is totally in love with me in return; I have finally moved out of home and have my independence; I have one book published and am roaring through the writing of more and more every day. I am happy and content. I'm not claiming everything is perfect cos that would be a totally ridiculous thing to say. I don't have enough money (who does?), I don't have any children (yeah, still on that kick ;D); and on a more personal note I haven't yet managed to shrug away all the baggage I carry around with me. But I am working on it. There's nothing worse than people living in the past, digging up old wounds and displaying them as an excuse for this, that and the other. I'm an adult now and I believe that when you get to a certain point in your life you just accept things as they are. Of course you keep striving for more, for better, for perfection, but I think if I ever reached it my head would explode.

But anyway, I digress. My point was that I had wonderful sex in a sticky hot bedroom and it was so good that it popped whatever was loose back into place and I am myself again! (Plus I'm on Day Two of my Pill, which means calm is restoring itself to my hormones once more ;D) I went onto dream about those fleshy bits on the back of hips. Actually I think the heat is just making me horny and when I'm horny I can't be bothered to think about life and how it all works and why we do what we do ;) Hooray for the summer!

Labels: life, love, rant, ray, sex, weather

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

I went back home to see my parents last night. And I felt extremely homesick when I was there and when I had to leave. I haven't felt homesickness like that since moving here.

I just felt myself starting to miss my old life. Talking to Daddy about rugby, laughing with Mammy over pretty much everything, being more than just a big sister to Amber. I missed the safe, quiet, homely feel I used to have in that house. It doesn't feel like home anymore. I adapt too quickly to change. I move on and accept that whereever I am, for however long I am there, is my new safe place, my new home. I'm the same when we go visiting other people. I adapt to their houses and find I never want to leave (unless it's truly awful and then I'm bolting for the door ;D). Well, last night all that adapting broke down and I just wanted to stay at home and be young and free and silly again. Not that I was that way very much when I lived there. I couldn't wait to get out, in fact. I suppose it's always the same. Growing up isn't always fun.

I've been jealous a lot this last week, too. Over stupid things, things that either can't be changed or don't even matter anyway. Like last night I was jealous that I no longer lived at home; I was jealous that Amber wasn't mine anymore; I was jealous that Daddy talks so much more to Ray than me these days (man chats about nails and roofs and stuff I don't understand); jealous that Mammy was going to the cinema with her friend without me. But I've also been jealous of how pretty Jemma is; how independent Hannah is; how strong Sarah has always been. I'm even jealous of all of Ray's aunts and uncles because they have such adorable children! I blame all of this insane girlie stupidity on my raging hormones. I'm expecting everything to calm the hell down again from today onwards because today at 9:40am I broke open a new satchet. I am officially back on the Pill again :)

Through my moping and insanity, I decided to buy Ray just one more teeny-tiny present for his birthday. This (if you're reading this Ray: do not click that link!). It's not his birthday for another month. At this rate I'll be bankrupt! I swear that's the last present... I think ;) I'm out of funds now so it has to be the last... I think ;)

Labels: amber, birthday, daddy, hormones, jem, life, mammy, presents, ray, the pill

by Ys | COMMENTS? 6 | permalink |

I fell into Outfit last night. I should probably sue them. Where there's a claim there's a blame and all that...

I then accidently fell into the sale rack. I looked down and found a white shirt on my arm. Dazed and confused, I continued down the shop. I fell into some gorgeous dresses but, lucky for me, they were all way above the knee and I don't wear anything that short. On I stumbled, tumbling from one rack of clothes to the next. Before I knew it a green cami top had joined the white shirt on my arm.

I begged Ray not to let me fall into Warehouse. They're too expensive, I mumbled incoherently, as I made my way through the racks of clothes. Far too expensive. Don't let me look! He took my arm and led me away from a row of lovely floral skirts. He's a good boyfriend.

I soon found myself in the changing rooms, dancing along to an All Saint's song, exclaiming far too loudly how much I adored the green top. I completely forgot I was in a changing room and had no one in there with me (usually I shop with Jem or/and Mammy and we give running commentry on what we're trying on - "I'm putting my right arm in that pink shirt I picked up," "My bum won't fit in these jeans!" "I'm not coming out dressed in this!" etc., etc.). The white shirt was next. It was a lovely fit, nicely fitted around the waist to show off the spread of my hips.

Outside again, I asked Ray to check the prices and to then tell me if I could have either. After a quick calculation he said I could have both! Both! I say again: he's a very good boyfriend :) At the till they must have thought I was going to sue them for the way I'd fallen into the shop and then fallen to the till with garments to buy, cos they knocked £4 off the shirt. I didn't need to ask. She just scanned the tag and it came up as £3.

We hot-tailed it out of the shop after that. Me smug with my new clothes, Ray smug cos it had come in under twenty quid. And that was my evening out. I now own these two lovely tops and want an excuse to wear them out and about ;)



I have one message for you all: Go Shopping! Go on, treat yourselves. I haven't had anything new in ages (since the car ate all the money we had) and it felt so good to finally just give in and splurge. I want everyone to share in that splurging goodness with me. Go splurge! Go!

PS: Don't forget to sponsor Hilary as well, that way when you're selfishly buying stuff for yourself you will know in your heart you've done some good elsewhere too :)

Labels: photos, ray, shopping

by Ys | COMMENTS? 5 | permalink |

It's a Saturday morning and I'm blogging. I never blog on a Saturday. But Ray has abandoned me for work and Jem has been sleeping off Kylie so isn't ready to go out and about walking the dogs yet.

I'm feeling a bit pissed off about everything today. Firstly, Ray ended up having to leave for work earlier than he originally said. He said 9, the boss said 8; I said, "How early?" in a girlishly high voice, then proceeded to pout to make him feel bad. It's sappy, I know, but on the weekends I like to wake up with Ray beside me. We only get two days out of the week to be in bed together in the mornings; now this week there's only one day. Grr.

More annoyingly, you know how I said I'd bought (no clicking or hovering over the links if your name is Ray!) this extremely cool gift for Ray's birthday? Well, it arrived yesterday and it turns out it's just this without the extra exclusive bits. So I had to then go and buy these so that it was a better present than what it was on its own. I don't mind spending the extra few pounds; I'm just pissed that I was told it was going to be better than what it was.

The postman then cheesed me off this morning by banging on the door at 8:15! 8:15 on a Saturday when on a weekday he can't be arsed to get here before 10! I didn't get out of bed and was royally pissed off when I found out he'd tried to deliver another of Ray's presents. So now I have to go down to the sorting office to pick it up. I'm more pissed at the time he woke me up than the actual having to collect the package cos I can get that easily enough when I walk the dogs. Do postmen do this just to piss me off or does everyone else have an annoyingly stupid postman who can't keep to decent times?

There. I think that's all my ranting done. I feel better already. Can you tell I'm on? ;)

Labels: birthday, life, post, presents, ray

by Ys | COMMENTS? 5 | permalink |

I had the house to myself yesterday. All day.

Jem and Mammy went to see Kylie Minogue up in Manchester yesterday. So not only did I get some Me Time (oh precious Me Time, I'd forgotten what that time was like), which entailled me cleaning, writing, and reading two-thirds of The Gunslinger. But I also got some Alone Time with Ray. Which meant eating lasagne and Tagliatelle (it seems to be our food of love ;D), watching Grand Designs (have I mentioned how I've commissioned Ray to build me my dream home?) & The Fifth Element (Ray fancies Milla Jovovich, while I've always had a thing for Bruce Willis); and much, much fun in the bedroom.

The house is all mine for another four hours or so, depending on traffic, and then I'll have to give it back to part-ownership again. I'd forgotten just how much I like being by myself. I was even a little put out when Ray came back from work last night, whereas usually I'm buzzing around by the door waiting for him to get back. I used to spend 90% of my time alone so having spent the last two years pretty much glued to Ray's side (don't get me wrong: it's a lovely place to be stuck) I'd forgotten how much of a loner I really am at heart. Don't worry I have no plans of ditching Ray to return to my loner-lifestyle (damn that pesky love thing!); I was just pleasantly reminded these past twenty-four hours that I can and do love my own company. It was still much more fun playing games with Ray in the evening, though ;)

I'm off unwrap some presents I'd ordered for Ray's birthday; some extremely cool (do not click the links Ray!!) presents. There's also this and this. My boy's a nerd. I always wanted a nerd. I prayed for many years and finally I got one ;)

Enjoy your weekends!

Labels: films, jem, life, love, mammy, ray, reading

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

I am sober 90% of the year. The one time I do get accidently drunk why does it have to be at a thirteen year old's birthday party? ;)

Last night Ray and I headed down to one of the local nightclubs cos his cousin (I think they're cousins; there's so many cousins I just say he's their uncle to make it easier for me to remember; we are Uncle Ray and Auntie Ysabel should anyone ask) was having a party there. It's her birthday next month but she wanted the party before school shut up shop for the summer. We were invited down so off we went.

First of all I was very excited that I got to sit in the VIP area, closed off with a rope and everything. Okay, it wasn't really a VIP section more like an OAP section. Us oldies sat out the way and let the kids go mad. Secondly, I was surprised by today's youth fashion. Do you know that kids these days are wearing? Teeny-tiny white shorts or skirts, coupled with brightly coloured tights and/or leg-warmers, and brightly coloured vest-tops. I had no idea that was today's fashion. It was like old-style rave fashion.

There were some shocking moments - like when all the girls made a tunnel and the boys went through and snogged whichever one they liked! That went on for about twenty minutes! I was cringing and hiding behind my hands. I do not want to see little people snogging. That was when the vodka-lemonades came in handy.

An hour or two later I was teaching Ray how to dance to the Grease melodymedley, and very enthusiastically dancing to the Superman song. You know that one? "Comb your hair, go for a walk, sneeze, now... superman!" I used to dance to that one a lot as a child at family parties so I was very excited to hear it being played, considering all night we'd had some extremely shocking music. You know the one that goes, "Face down, arse up, that's the way we like to fuck"? Yeah, that one. At a thirteen year old's party!

I laughed and laughed and laughed. And I didn't once put my foot in it, which I always do when I'm trying hard to keep away from certain subject matters, or, in my usual case, a seemingly innocent outcry of annoyance, which although hilarious to me in its melodrama can upset people who are fragile. It was such a fun night. I'd forgotten how much fun it is hanging out with the family (be they mine or the in-laws). And cos Ray and I are neither "The Kids" or "The Adults" we mingle with both groups and then get left alone a lot to be naughty. Hence all the drinking.

Sounds like fun, yeah? But then I had to get up this morning and go and play badminton. Oh dear did I regret every single drop of vodka I'd put in my body. I worried there'd be vomit but I held it together. In fact, it was Jemma who injured herself by pulling a muscle in the back of her thigh. The game was cut short due to that and the fact that I was nauseous and we'd bust our last two shuttlecocks (we have more but Ray left them in the work's van last night!). Do you know the annoying thing? I never used to suffer from hangovers before. But I haven't had a proper getting-drunk drink in about six months and so now my body has forgotten how to cope!

Roll on the next kid's birthday party I say!

Labels: badminton, drinking, in-laws, life, ray

by Ys | COMMENTS? 3 | permalink |

I'm better! It's a miracle! I somehow beat tonsillitis into submission. I am completely indebted to Echinacea pills. Seriously, I can't reccomend these pills any more strongly. They are miracle workers. I used to be ill all the time but now I haven't had a proper illness since I started taking them! And if they can beat off tonsillitis then I'm going to take them until the end of my days. Thanks for all the well-wishes :)

Now I can pimp my new goodies.

First of all: my precious kitchen. It's my new room to dress (I love saying I'm dressing a room; I don't know what else to call it cos I'm not furnishing it!). White With Spots is the theme. So Jem got some pots...



Which are now filled with tea, cofee and sugar. Look at how pretty they are next to my fantabulous teapot:



She also bought us a utensils-drainer. I don't know what that's called actually. It's basically a pot to put the knives and forks in when they're drying off after being washed up. It matches our one for the plates, etc. perfectly:



That's inside the house done. I now have some extremely exciting news (well it is to me anyway... ;D): I have grown my first tomatoe!!



I can't take all the credit cos Ray has been helping me out a lot with it, but, it's still a tomatoe and I've never grown one before with or without help. The outside plants tend to be left to me to look after so I'm happy to take most of the credit ;) But it was Ray's idea to move them outside; I thought they'd die. Turns out I was wrong (he's gonna love that ... ;D). I'll let you know if it ever turns red and if I get anymore growing! The peppers are doing great - both normal and sweet kinds. We've been happily eating the normal peppers for the past couple of months; the sweet ones need a bit longer. The peas are nearly ready for eating as well! How good are we? Growing our own food!

And you should have seen the amount of rubbish we recycled this week - clothes, shoes, paper, cardboard and an old TV. I do love to recycle. It's a nice place to visit cos everyone's really nice. I met a short woman this week who couldn't reach the tall cardboard-bin so I had to help. And a man taught us that we had to poke the clothes into the clothes-bin cos it was so full.

Ray loved his phone, by the way. He was playing with it all night so I think that means it was a success :)

Finally, please can everyone say a big Happy Birthday to Martha over at her blog? She's ten today!

Labels: house stuff, illness, life, photos, ray, recycling, veg

by Ys | COMMENTS? 4 | permalink |

I'm ill. It might be tonsillitis, again, but it might not. I've been pumping my body full of painkillers, sucking on Strepsils and drinking squash every other minute, and it seems to have slowed down the process. I'm hoping it might have stopped the bug all together but I've never known tonsillitis to be stopped in its tracks before. So I'm just waiting around, seeing how it develops. It made me sleep for ten hours last night! So it's not all bad ;)

I've got lots of photos of the house I want to share - new goodies, new developments with the plants - but I'm too sickly to post them today so I'll save them for another time.

About the only productive thing I did this weekend was buy Ray an early birthday present...



It's a Sony Ericsson T280i. He wanted a different one, one that had a few more gadgets on but considering his phones only last on average six months I told him I wasn't going to spend all that money. The T280i is a great looking phone, anyway, and I'm sure he'll be happy with it. His latest phone died last week and considering he needs one for work I figured an early birthday present was in order. It should be arriving any minute. Then I just need to find the energy to wrap it up ;)

Ahh I hope this illness passes over soon. For today I'm just going to have to curl up with a good book and keep the fluids up.

Labels: birthday, illness, mobile phone, photos, ray, shopping, tonsillitis

by Ys | COMMENTS? 6 | permalink |

Ray and I went out last night for drinks. While we were in the pub we decided to treat ourselves to a desert. We were tempted to have two separate choices but it worked out cheaper (and you know how I love to save every penny I can) if we shared something called an Ultimate Sharing Sundae. It sounded lovely:

Chocolate fudge cake, profiteroles, vanilla flavour ice cream, Cadbury’s Crunchie Nuggets and chocolate flakes with chocolate flavour fudge sauce and a whip of cream

And it was. But it was also huge. It was apparently meant for two people to share but I think even four would have struggled. I ate as much as I could but I had to leave the rest for Ray. I think I must have gained about fifty pounds just by looking at it!

We ended the evening in Tesco - yes, we are that hardcore ;) We bought two storage boxes (blue and black, not silver and black, though) for the bedroom. While I fell in love with all the circus kitchen accessories, which all appeared to be on the sale, which probably means they won't be available for much longer :( I can't wait 'til we can properly dress the kitchen.

Now then, do you want to test how smart you are? It's an english test. I am a writer, an avid reader, and English is my first language... yet I only got 15/20! Test Your Brain. Let me know how you got on :)

Labels: food, house stuff, pub, quiz, ray, shopping

by Ys | COMMENTS? 5 | permalink |

The xbox360 broke Friday night. I beleive they call it the ring of death. Because it basically means the xbox has fried. But through the despair and worry, we went online and booked it in to get fixed, not really knowing how we'd find the money to get it done, we learnt that because this is a known problem with the xbox360 console, and because we've had it less than three years (not even a year yet actually!), we can get it fixed for free. Which is a big relief. Ray packaged it up and today the man from UPS came to collect it. The only good thing we can take from it is it does mean we've dug out the old xbox console and are now playing the original Lego Star Wars game. Ray is very upset, though. He loves his xbox360. I've spent most of the weekend keeping his hands busy elsewhere...

I went to see the new Narnia film Saturday afternoon with Mammy and Jemma. Such a good film. I highly reccomend it. It's darker and yet funnier than the first one. Jem is suicidal, though, cos Peter has said he won't be returning to Narnia again. We're meant to be seeing Hancock this weekend, which looks so funny. I'm really starting to get used to these girlie afternoons we spend in the cinema. I'm going to be sad if they stop.

At the moment I'm listening/watching live wimbledon because I don't want to miss my favourite player: Lleyton Hewitt. Typically he's up against Federrer, which means this will probably be the last game I see him play this tournament. I'm trying to write Olimpia Valley at the same time but something tells me I'm going to get distracted by a cute Australian in white shorts.

Labels: films, jem, lego star wars, lleyton hewitt, mammy, narnia, ray, tennis, wimbledon, xbox, xbox 360

by Ys | COMMENTS? 3 | permalink |

Do you remember how two weeks ago I said I was broody? Well I still am. And it's got much worse. In fact, throughout all my years of getting these bouts of broodiness, they've never quite felt like this. Could be simply because I could technically have a baby this time, what with me having a boyfriend who I have sex with. But then again it could be because I'm at that age where having babies goes from something I'm going to do some time in the future to something that's going to happen sooner rather than later. It also has a hell of a lot to do with the fact that I really love Ray and want to have his baby. And I've never really wanted to physically have children before; my plan was to adopt. I just keep looking at Ray and thinking of the very beautiful children we could make together.

But that was not in the plan. I was all set for enjoying a few years with Ray alone. Just me and him and no one else. We've never been on our own yet, not properly. I wanted marriage, a house of our own, time to ourselves. Then babies. And I still want that. But my hormones are screaming out in pain because that means another couple of years, at least, without having a baby of my own.

So there's the cause of my recent downward mood swing. I was hoping it wasn't that but it is, I know it is. My plan is to talk it out of my brain, my heart and soul. Then in a few days time, maybe a couple of weeks, I can look back and think Phew, thank God I didn't go and get myself pregnant; I so don't want a baby now. That's the plan anyway.

[P.S. Martha has finally updated her blog.]

Labels: broody, children, life, love, ray

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

I'm broody.

This happens from time to time. I have this overwhelming urge to be a mother. It's not neccasarily about babies or being pregnant or any of that, it's just about being a mother. I've always felt like this. That's why I assumed I'd adopt or foster, that that's what I was made to do. Originally I didn't question it but now I wonder if it's God's plan for me, or/and if maybe my one remaining ovary might be a dud. Losing the ability to have children would be extremely depressing, no matter how much I want to adopt/foster because then the choice is taken away and not being able to conceive feels like the worst pain imaginable.

I'm going to blame my cousin for this recent bout of broodiness. I went to visit her and her family (my aunt, uncle and other cousin) last week. She had a child four years ago who I've only seen once before and that was a few years ago. It was at a family party so he was asleep and being taken off to bed. So this was the first time I really met him. And what a kid he is to meet. He doesn't stop talking - ever. He's the most confident child I think I've ever met. I'll admit that during the first hour I was petrified of him. I thought there was no way I was ever going to have children. But once he calmed down and stopped showing off he became this adorable little boy who just needed constant attention. We ended up playing Refreshment Library Trolley for about an hour, with him delivering us books and giving us all of a minute to read them.

I can see that living with him, raising him, being with him twenty-four-seven would be an endurance test of the most patient, but just visiting him for a few hours has set off the mother within and now I'm broody for my own little nest of children. The weird part is is that I know I don't really want children now. I think there's an inner battle between Psychotic Mother Me who wants to save all the children of the world now now now, and Sensible Selfish Me who wants time to grow up without children hanging off me, wants to be alone with Ray before children come into the mix, and, well, we honestly can't afford children.

Needless to say, I think Ray is keeping a very close eye on my Pill packet to make sure I'm swallowing all the tablets ;)

Labels: broody, children, motherhood, ray

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

I got waylaid and ended up reading...

Children of the Dust by Louise Lawrence


rating: 5 of 5 stars

I first read this book when I stole it from my older sister who was reading it for a school project. The first section of the book "Sarah" had me in tears. Being of a similar age to Sarah I was really upset by the horrors she had to face.

The next two books go on to show the next generations of Sarah's family and how they survived the nuclear holocaust. It's an interesting view. I like the way the author didn't shy away from the mutilation, from the harsh reality of life after a nuclear holocaust.

It still is one of my favourite books and I read it frequently.

View all my reviews.

I love that book so much. I think it's what made me a little bit sickly obsessed with nuclear war. I'm calling it research for my next novel but really that's a lie. My next book does not deal with nuclear war but it does deal with bombs of some nature, more the long-term effects. Yes, the new novel is dark.

There was also, rather spookily, a programme on TV What Would Happen If Human's Suddenly Disappeared, which was also very helpful.

I'm a little weirded out by how much information I'm getting without even having to really sit down and do proper research. I'll take it a sign from God that my next project should be Olimpia Valley. That I should stop thinking about what to do and start planning the damn book. At least sort out the concept. I still don't know whether to do a series or one big novel, how to set the chapters out - long or short? One character's perspective or a few? Whether to pepper the chapters with additional information, such as history and politics? Hmm, so many questions to answer. I love this part best of all. So many ideas, so much excitement, so much hope.

And last night Ray and I went out on an impromptu date to... Homebase, where we played house. I've found the toilet seat of my dreams. Ray says he'll buy me it for Christmas ;) I also fell in love with some handles for the kitchen units (can't find them on the website...). And something we should be picking up this weekend: Shower Rail because the plastic crappy one the landlord left us with has fallen apart for the last time. I can't wait 'til we're able to do proper decorating in our own house.

Labels: house stuff, olimpia valley, ray, reading, review, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

Wow it's been a busy weekend.

First of all: Joe Absolom finally has a new project. So I was running round (online obviously) trying to find news about that. I love it when he does new projects cos I get to play with my site :)

The weekend was ruled by dog-sitting. Not paid this time, just looking after the dogs, cats, rabbits and birds for my parents while they're away on their holidays. Amber was doing some days and when she was out me and Ray took up the challenge. The first afternoon was awful. The dogs were wound up because we'd brought Sweepie with us and just basically misbehaved the entire time. We went back Saturday for the night and that was much more bearable. We watched Alien Vs Predator - Requiem. It was Ray's choice of film. I didn't really understand what was going on so just before it ended I had to admit my stupidity and ask him what the Predator guy was up to. He explained the history of it (why didn't the film explain he was after the Queen Alien?) and then it made more sense. It was still quite a pants film, though.

In between all the dog-sitting, I suggested we go have a picnic in the water park. That was really nice. The sun was out, it was lovely and warm, the dogs had a great time, and we treated ourselves to some yummy food. Mmm. The coast was covered in mist from the sea so we went for a walk in it. It was quite spooky. And when we came home the second time from my parents house, we decided to eat pizza and chips outside in the garden. It was great to be able to really enjoy our surroundings and make the most of it. The picnic, the walk on the beach, the dinner in the garden: it was great to really appreciate this place, this place that is my home. I'm so lucky :)

You can see pictures from my weekend here, including shots from home, the picnic, the beach and our dinner in the garden.

Not being at home for most of the weekend does mean I have heaps of stuff to catch up on today. Expect multiple comments on missed blog entries, emails answered, my hair freshly dyed and a new book to read because Ray liked the sound of other one I was meant to start and has nicked it to read first.

Labels: amber, beach, daddy, dog-sitting, films, house stuff, joe absolom, life, mammy, photos, ray, reading, websites

by Ys | COMMENTS? 3 | permalink |

It was a bank holiday weekend so naturally it rained.

At least it was dry Saturday when I went out for a girly day with Mammy and Jem. There was a little shopping (I found nothing but have decided that yellow is my favourite colour this summer), a little lunch (Jem had an egg-mayonaise sandwich and has been ill ever since), and, the highlight of the day (and the summer if you're my mother) we went to see Indiana Jones IV.

I was raised on the original trilogy, probably due to my mother's obsessioncrush on Harrison Ford. As a life-long fan, I have to say that the fourth film did not disappoint. I loved how it was alien-based because the great mystery of the fifties (when it was set) was the Roswell alien spaceship crash. It was classic Indie from start to finish. And whoever decided to cast Shai LaBeouf (how do you pronounce his name?) as mini-Indie needs a big gold star. He is just lovely (but I'll save that gushing for another time). So, if you're a fan of the Indiana films then you should love the new one. If you're new to them, as some of the kids were in the audience, then you might want to not go in there expecting it to be like your run-of-the-mill noughties kid's film cos it's not anything like that. A great action film and absolutely hilarious. I hope they make another one!

Apart from that the weekend was literally a wash out. I had picnics and feeding-the-ducks planned but it all had to be scrapped. Sunday was spent trying to get bits and pieces together so Ray could change a tyre on the car (yes that damn car again; thsi time it wasn't the car's fault; there was a nail on the road - pop!). And Monday just never really got started. Although we did watch half of Return of the King (only half cos that film is long - great but long).

It was a nice weekend, though, weather aside. Love, films, sitting around doing not very much, reading, Lord of the Rings - and Banoffee Pie mmmm. The duck's can have their bread later in the week ;)

EDIT @ 5PM: I've updated the projects section, which is all the way down on the right-hand side of the page :)

Labels: car, films, indiana jones, jem, mammy, ray, shia labeouf, shopping, weather

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

Ray.

He's the guy who wakes me up early every morning to give me a goodbye kiss before work. (Apparently he stays to watch me sleep as well - which I do not think is fair - how awful must I look? Dribbling and all!)

I love the way he comes in from work - smelling of sweat and covered in dust. I love how he holds his hands away from me as he's hugging me in case he ruins my clothes. I especially love how he comes downstairs smelling of manfume and wearing his pretty clothes, proclaiming that the effort is all for my benefit and no one else.

The way he holds my hand on the dinner table when we've both finished our meals and are either waiting for Jem to finish (eat faster girl!) or are all talking about some thing or another. The way he hooks his foot through the bottom rung of my chair so that he's ever so slightly boxing me in, keeping me safe.

The fact that coffee always follows a meal.

I love that he likes the stupid programmes that I do. Curling up on the sofa, leaning on his shoulder, listening to his heart beat, watching "Great British Menu" or "Doctor Who" or some programme about the countryside of Britain. I love that it doesn't usually matter what's on the TV, just being with him, quiet and together, reconnecting after we've been apart all day.

I love how he tickles me - even though I claim otherwise. How he grabs my hips and strokes down my legs, as if I'm a horse that needs its muscles checking. The way he holds my hand - even when we're just sitting in the house.

I love the curl of hair at the back of his neck and the sides of his ears. His floppy fringe that never listens and always needs to be stroked to one side. His so pretty blue eyes, perfect straight white teeth and gorgeous full lips. I love that he stopped shaving for me and now has year-round closely-trimmed facial hair. I love the little ginger hairs that grow in it; I love plucking out the long hairs that he misses with the shaver.

I especially love the games we play when we're cleaning our teeth at night. Secret games that are only for us to know but make me laugh night after night.

The riding crop, the handcuffs, the belts. The lessons on how to fit a condom correctly. The way his eyes roll when he's enjoying himself. His obsession with tongues and saliva. The pleasure that comes every single time - yes, every single time. When he doesn't cry out when I draw blood on his back, and refuses to let me feel guilty for it.

The way he tickles my back every single night to send me to sleep. The hugs before sleep comes. The final kiss, as if there won't be another. The I-love-you's, as if there won't come a time to say them again. The puff of his lips as he falls asleep.

Happy anniversary, baby. I love you.

Labels: anniversary, love, ray

by Ys | COMMENTS? 4 | permalink |

The dog did run away again. He got past me, dug up the stuff I'd put in the hole he'd made and scarpered. He was back by morning and I practically ran out the door when it was time for me to go home. That was officially the most stressful day on the job so far. For the first time in ages, Ray and I slept in each other's arms all night last night. Usually one of us gets too hot or my neck starts to hurt (I have a weakness in my neck from when I pulled it a few years ago) so we pull apart during the night. I think I was so desperate for some protection I stayed close to him all night. It was nice. I'd say it might become the norm but I know it won't so there's no point. I overheat when I'm asleep. I'm sure there's some scientific reason for it. I'm cold when I'm awake and boiling when asleep. Weird.

Today I finally did some writing. It's felt like writing is just a hobby I do if I have time lately. Not as if writing is my full-time job, which it is. I hate it when it gets like that. It's all these jobs. I know they're only for a couple of days but it breaks up the routine and then I can't get back to it cos I'm catching up on other things that need doing.

I've uploaded some new photos, which are from various weekends/weekdays I've spent enjoying the sun. There's a lot of the dogs this time round (as if that's not the norm ;D).

I've also become a little obsessed with Good Reads and have been posting some small reviews of the books I've read recently. I always find book reviews helpful when I'm choosing a book to read but I never write any so I thought I'd put that right been as I must have read about ten books in the last month! And a lot of them have been really quirky and very me. Such as Landscape With Animals which is an erotic but has more to it than just that - so rare to find. And Polystom which was both sci-fi and olde worlde - again, extremely rare to find such a mix. It's so nice to find other authors who mix genres like I do. There is hope for me yet :) And even if there isn't it does prove that there are good books out there.

Labels: dog-sitting, photos, ray, reading, websites, writing

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

Who was it that said my job sounded easy?

Last night I got only two very fitful hours of sleep, curled up on the sofa, worrying out of my brain. For the first time since I've been coming here (about two years now), the dog ran away. He has been known to do it in recent months (something about being old and full of anxiety, according to the vet) but has never done it while I've been here.

I let him outside at 9pm last night and that was the last I saw of him. It got darker and darker, later and later. He'd been gone for two hours, then all of a sudden it was four. Somehow I fell asleep at one. I woke at three from a dream telling me he'd returned. He hadn't. Half asleep I somehow got through the next hour and a half before calling Ray and asking him what he thought I should do. His Sunday lie-in was kind of shattered after that. It started getting light out and I was sure the dog would return then. He still hadn't when Ray arrived, my knight in shining armour (wearing dirty jeans and a very tired smile), at six a.m. By this time I was convinced something awful had happened to the dog. He's twelve years old, gone a bit senile, trusts anyone and had been gone for nine hours - all of them hours during the night. We scoured the streets together: no sign. When I got in at 6:30 I knew I had to call his owner. Second person I woke up. He assured me not to worry, cursed the dog and told me I should have gone back to bed and left him out there hehe.

I was really worrying by 8am. It was coming up for twelve hours since he'd last been seen. Twelve hours is a long time in a dog's life. I went to the backdoor even though I knew he couldn't scramble back in the way he'd got out and there he was. Lying on his side, washing his bits, bold as brass. I yanked open the door and in he trotted as if he'd just been outside for a ten minute stroll round the garden.

The garden was blocked off, Ray was sent home and I slept through for another four and a half hours. I've had a quick shower, can't be bothered to brush my hair yet, still half-asleep, and knowing I have to get through another night. Will he stick around tonight?

(P.S. I had no idea word verification was on cos I've never activated it. Blogger must have gone nuts: their comment pages have been weird lately. Sorry for the inconvenience but I'm sure you all knew what to do: pretty much every blog I visit has it activated. It should be fixed again now anyway.)

Labels: blogging, dog-sitting, ray, websites

by Ys | COMMENTS? 2 | permalink |

Last night we took Little Red for his final drive. He's been an outstandingly good little car. Yes, he's small and he may not go as fast as some of the others out there, but he was just one of those cars that just had a funny little character. He survived years of hardwork with Ray's boss (he used to deliver kitchens in that car!!!), and then finally came into retirement with Ray. Not really much of a retirement, though, considering all the trips to Cardiff and back, the big bump, the moving house, and all the back and forth to work and relatives houses.

As I said in the previous post, he may have looked good on the outside (no rust whatsoever), on the inside he was dying. So we let him go.



Little Red now resides in the Show Room in the Sky.

But we still needed a car. So after much-searching, Ray fell in love with a silver Vauxhall Corsa. She (yes, she's a she) is small and compact but still much bigger than Little Red. She's also a diesel, which makes Ray love her almost as much as he loves me.



She doesn't have a name yet. But she is the new addition to our family. So we went from white car to red car, finally to silver car - and this little lady has five doors. Do you know how long I had to nag at Ray to get him to buy another car with five doors? Is it a boy-thing to want a car with only three?

Anyway, welcome into the family Little Miss. I hope you'll tell us your name soon. Ooh isn't she pretty and shiny?

Labels: car, photos, ray

by Ys |